released.

Today honesty soars. I sit here in bed, thinking about what goes on.

Rosie walked by me tonight hugging me and telling me how her 'boss' gave her $10 and a sweater. It made her evening as she now gets to go to the bar down the street. I wonder what made her get to this point in her life - the neighborhood drunk. It makes me dreadfully sad.

I am also -gulp- feeling quite guilty about Christmas. Apparently I was quite rude to our 'family friends.'(as stated by my mother.) This was not an intentional move on my part, but a reaction to the circumstances at hand. I made no effort to be friendly and warm - I was cold and unresponsive to the festivities surrounding me. Instead of partaking in an after dinner poker game I decided to sit and read alone. I truly acted like a stuck up bitch, when in all reality I just wanted to not be social. I am quite embarrassed and wish to forget the whole thing. Yet, in my overly analytical being I cannot stop replaying my bad attitude in my mind.

Sometimes I am quite proud of my evolution of a person, but Christmas made me digress about a decade.

I am unsure if an apology is in order or if I should just keep my head down.

Bed time.